When we think of celebrity moms who are completely in touch with reality, probably the absolute last woman we think of is Dina Lohan. Unless the reality in which we are talking about refers to reality TV, then we remember her name.

Orange Oprah's mediocre, two-bit bitch and hoebag show, Living Lohan, only lasted a summer on E!. But, hold on, because Dina reveals that a new show might be coming our way. In a recent interview, she says: "We're working with another network on another idea. Yeah, not reality per se, but a realistic show."

Um, and how will that differ from Living Lohan exactly?

In the same interview with Life & Style Weekly, Dina admits that the execs at E! tried to give the show a little edge by asking her and her family to do "crazy things", such as have Dina fake a pregnancy.

Nothing would have saved that show, except maybe having the cameras follow Lindsay around. Then again, they already do anyway and we don't have to suffer through commercials or Dina!

[Image via WENN.]

You gotta love Dina Lohan.

And by "love," we mean "hope she chokes on her daughter's drunken vomit and is never heard from again."

Speaking to Life & Style last week, the awful mother of Lindsay and Ali claimed money wasn't the motivation for starring in her ridiculous E! reality show, while adding that she was the one who put an end to Living Lohan.

"I only did the show to defuse the rumors," Dina said. "And then they wanted us to do these crazy things, like my son cheating on his girlfriend, me faking a pregnancy. I was like, 'No, no, no! They had ideas that weren't conducive to our ideas."

Sorry, Kate Gosselin. But even you have a long way to go before snatching the title of World's Worst Mother from Dina Lohan.

Fortunately, the world hasn't seen the last of the self-proclaimed "White Oprah" on the small screen.

"We're working with another network on another idea," she said. "Yeah, not reality per se, but a realistic show."

Rumors state that it may be called My Life as a Pimp: How to Spawn Attention-Starved Drug Addicts That Only Receive Hugs When They Bring Home Lots of Cash.

Addressing reports that Lindsay was suspected of stealing $500,000 worth of jewelry from an Elle photo shoot, Dina Lohan wants everyone to know her daughter is innocent. People reports: "Last month her personal cell was posted online and now... ...read full story

It's now momma Lohan's turn to defend messy daughter Lindsay.

And Dina Lohan wants the world to know little Lindsanity isn't a complete mess!

She also believes Linds didn't steal the jewels from that Elle shoot earlier this month.

According to Dina, any suggestion that Lindsay was involved in stealing the jewelry is "defamatory, false and unfair."

She adds that, "Last month her personal cell was posted online and now her phone messages have been hacked. This must stop. She is a 22-year-old girl who needs to live her life in peace. The tabloids need to leave her alone with all the lies and reporting with no proof."

As for Lindsay, Dina says she's "been home with me and her family for awhile now, celebrating her little brother's confirmation and his 13th birthday."

She's such a good girl, that Lindsay.

You are such a good mom, Dina!

[Image via WENN.]

Lordy, lordy does Dina Lohan need a clue!

She truly is a terrible parent, as she pretty much lets her daughters do whatever they please.

Now, Life & Style has pointed out (like we mentioned a few weeks ago) that Ali Lohan has raided Lindsay's closet for outfits not appropriate for someone her age. But Dina stands by and insists that it's fine and that Lindsay is a good role model for Ali…

Say what?!

"Ali looks up to her sister, as every younger sister does. Lindsay is very stylish — a style icon…Lindsay is a good person to have watch over Ali right now," Dina tells Life & Style. "Lindsay can show Ali the ropes. Ali’s out there working on her record and singing career."

Um, Dina? Have you not happened to notice that Lindsay hasn't been in a movie in years and her singing career bombed? Or do you live in a universe where Lindsanity is still that adorable little kid in the Parent Trap?

Wake up and smell the DUIs, Mom! And try and get it right with the little one…if you still can!

Our guess: No.

[Image via WENN.]

For Mother's Day, AOL conducted an online survey asking parents to rate which celebrities they would feel most comfortable leaving their kids with.

And parents picked Ellen DeGeneres and her wife, Portia de Rossi! The couple beat out Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt. Jennifer Aniston beat Ange too.

WTF????

Nor did Angelina do well in the Best Mom category, ranking only number 5 in a list topped by Jennifer Garner. Garner was followed by first lady Michelle Obama and Reese Witherspoon in a tie.

And as far as Worst Mom goes, Courtney Love performed better than Dina Lohan.

[Image via WENN.]

Despite the fact her oldest daughter is actively trying to start a lesbian relationship with her younger daughter to fill the void left by the volatile, high-profile previous one, Dina Lohan insists she's a great mom. She particularly takes... ...read full story

Dina Lohan wants us to rest assured that she is a great mom, though all the evidence contradicts it.

She explains to reporter David Caplan that her 15 year old daughter, Ali Lohan, is very focused on her studies and her recording project and nothing else.

"Ali is in a home-schooling program. She has never been pulled out of school. It's the same home-schooling program that Lindsay was in since the tenth grade."

Yeah, look how well she turned out, huh?

Dina is also quick to remind us of all her mealticket's daughter's business ventures, like Lindsay's spray tan line and Ali's upcoming fashion line.

Dina understands that her family's high profile garners media attention, but says, "We just wish people would leave us alone – at least for Mother's Day!"

Trust us, no one cares about YOU. Just your kids. Get over it.

[Image via WENN.]

Dina Lohan is slamming reports that question her parenting skills and claim that her 15-year-old daughter, Ali, is socializing instead of studying.

"Ali is in a home-schooling program. She has never been pulled out of school," Dina tells People. "It's the same home-schooling program that Lindsay was in since the 10th grade. It's a wonderful program many celebrities are enrolled in."

Defending her parenting skills (and we use the term loosely), Dina Lohan says, "I am a single mom of four children, and I devote my life to my children."

As for recent reports that Ali Lohan has been bitten by the partying bug, Dina says her daughter "is working, working hard. She's recording, and she's working on a fashion line. Ali has also been supporting her sister."

Dina Lohan just wants money and attention the best for her children.

Lindsay Lohan, who recently split from girlfriend Samantha Ronson, is also focusing on her career (and we also use that term loosely), her proud mom says.

"Lindsay is working extremely hard," Dina said of her Adderall-addict daughter. "Her new spray tan line sold more than 100,000 units at Sephora in one day."

There are so many things wrong with that statement, and this woman in general, that we don't even know where to start. We'll just pass and move on.

Dina says she understands that her family's high profile garners attention, but says, "We just wish people would leave us alone – at least for Mother's Day!"

That's the problem with becoming a cheap media whore at your kids' expense - celebrity gossip sites scrutinize Lindsay Lohan pictures. Funny how that works.

If you were worried about Ali Lohan missing school to go out shopping and on vacation and walk the red carpet with her big sister, Lindsay, then worry no more!

Momager Dina Lohan has assured us that Ali is, in fact, home schooled!

The Mother of the Year explained that "in the business, it's gotten difficult for Ali to be in school" and anyway, school has always been "a little tougher for Ali." That's probably because all the teachers wonder why a 40-year-old is in a middle school class.

There, now you can all rest easy.

pAArty on, Aliana. Rehab is always there for you!

[Image via WENN.]

Oh, Dina!

Always rushing to take credit for Lindsanity's successes, aren't you???

Dina claims La Loca Lohan's video for Funny or Die was her idea!

"I said 'Lindsay let's just do funnyordie.com and just kind of make fun of it all.' It's really gotten out of hand, the rumors and everything that they're saying about myself and my children," blabbed the mother of the year.

If the idea for the vid was indeed Dina's, no doubt the fame-whoring mom would have cut into Linds' screen time with a 'cameo'!

Watch her have her own video by the end of next week!

[Image via WENN.]

Mother of the year!

How did Lindz spend the night last night???? pAArtying, of course!

And, her mummy, Dina, dropped La Loca off at Bardot club in HOllywood.

Does she chop Lindsay's coke up for her too???

Seen here confirming her undying love of Coke, Lindsay Lohan may be getting back together with Samantha Ronson soon, according to People: "It changes every five seconds," a friend of Lohan's tells PEOPLE. "It is up in the air... ...read full story

With all the craziness surrounding Lindsay Lohan these past few days, nothing would surprise.

The former actress is on a vicious downward spiral, and her mother ain't doing shit to stop it!

In fact, it's now being reported that LezLo LOLhan was caught drinking crazy amounts of Vodka while out pAArtying at a club in Hollywood on Monday night, you know, when most normal people are home sleeping.

As we mentioned earlier, Lindz, apparently still not over the "break up" with saMAN, was out clubbing when she was spotted downing a bottle of Belvedere vodka - straight from the bottle! - at her table.

Oh, and all of this while mommy of the year, Dina Lohan, was sitting at the table as well!

Then La Loca Lohan reportedly proceeded to mix herself some vodka and Diet Cokes throughout the night. Nice to see she's still weight conscious, opting for the diet soda instead of good ol' regular Coke. She gets enough of that up the nose!

As for Dina, she spent the night drinking glasses of white wine and partying with her cash cow crazed daugher.

How truly sad.

Maybe another trip to rehab is what Lindsay needs right now?

Oh, and maybe a better mom and friends!

[Image via WENN.]

The latest chapter from Dina Lohan's Guide to Parenting?

Want to bond with the kids?

Take your 15-year-old daughter out clubbing in Hollywood!

On a weeknight!

Dina decided to take a good ol' fashioned family outing with daughters Ali and LOLhan to Villa nightclub last week but the Lohans were turned away due to Ali being ridiculously underage.

Dina shouted the ever-so-classic "Do you know who I am???" at Villa employees with LezLo piping up, "You're making a huge mistake. Huge!"

You tell em, Lohans!

[Image via WENN.]